Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Why does God allow pain?

Why does God allow pain?  The answers often seem so trite.
"No pain...no gain."  Really?
"He won't give you more than you can handle."  Well, why give it to me at all?
"Because it draws you closer to Him."  One would hope, but sometimes it makes us bitter.

I don't have all of the answers.  I can only share what God has taught me.  And, He taught me a big lesson last week.

And, so the story goes...

It was Wednesday night.  Last Wednesday night.  All of my children were sleeping blissfully in their warm, comfortable beds.  I was thinking about the day and how happy Ian had been.  This poor little guy has been so sick the past three months with terrible infections in his throat, so it was wonderful to see him SO happy.  He had been dancing and singing and jumping and playing.  It was so good to see him so happy...and healthy.  I was standing in the kitchen talking to Roger when I broke down crying.  Of course, he asked what was wrong and this was my reply, "I feel so guilty."  You see, I had watched my little guy be happy all day and he was oblivious to the fact that I...yes me...by myself...was taking him to the hospital the following morning and allowing people to put him in terrible pain.  How could I do this to my child?  Why would I allow someone to hurt him?  He is too little to understand.  Are we sure this is best for him?  Do we have to put him through this?  In the end, I knew this was best for him, but I still didn't want to do it.

And then...God showed me that it is the same for tough circumstances in our lives...for painful moments in our lives.
Why would God allow people, or circumstances to hurt us?  How could He do that to us?  Are we too "young" to understand?  How could this possibly be what is best for us?  Do we have to go through this?

I understand that getting tonsils removed pales in comparison to tough circumstances in life, but it was through Ian's surgery that He taught me that sometimes pain is necessary to bring us to what is good.  Ian's tonsils were so bad that they were literally falling apart.  It appeared that he was finally getting healthy, but, in reality, he was still a very sick little boy.  He needed to go through the pain of having his tonsils surgically removed, so he could get to what is good...living without this terrible infection...being truly healthy.

Putting it into perspective...life examples:
I have had three miscarriages, losing four precious babies.  Yes, God allowed this pain.  It is still painful.  So, how can this be good for me?  Why would He allow me to go through this?  I do not know completely.  Somehow, He works all things together for our good.  I do know that I am much more compassionate and understanding when a mom loses her baby to miscarriage.  I know that God is sometimes silent, but always present.  I know that He knows what is best for me and I need to trust Him...even when I do not understand.  I see each child as a miracle and I am amazed each time I deliver a healthy baby...and completely grateful.

Praying for those who are going through the bad, and wondering where the good is:
A couple in WV who recently lost their baby when she was only 24 weeks pregnant.
My friend, Rachel's, brother and sister-in-law who lost their baby recently, just a few weeks before the due date.
My sweet cousin, Robin, who is grieving the loss of her 34 year old husband who tragically died last week...and her three precious children, who are missing their daddy.
My friend, Stephanie, who is going through treatments for cancer while trying to be a wife and mommy.
My on-line friend, Tesney, and her husband who flew all the way to Russia for a second time to adopt their little boy with Down Syndrome, but were refused by the judge.  And so, Kirill sits in a mental institution with no person to love him.

Where is the good in these situations?  I have no idea.  BUT, I know God is there...He knows their journey...and even when we cannot see the good...it is there...somewhere.

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